Temporary Shower

I wrote last week about how I was contemplating medication to control my anxiety and after much debate (mostly internal), I have decided to try my next rotation without meds. This was not easy for me because I’m scared I’ll feel miserable again but I think part of me knows it is just how third year goes and looking back, I’ve been through much worse. I think I just need to a) start getting up an hour before work so I can study (and feel better about myself) before the day starts and b) stop studying 30 min before bed. With that said, I am determined to live by the following advice from a friend for the next 2 month: In other news, this is my last week of my research elective and I am glad to have caught some of the transition from summer into fall. We celebrated the moon festival with game night and I celebrated having weekends by squeezing as much fun in as possible. I have one weekend left and I’m planning on hiking,  date night, and maybe a movie. I’m super excited! ...

I have been battling some really bad anxiety since starting med school and after going through psychiatry, I realized that some of what I feel is not normal. I am usually pretty laid back but when I get stressed, I can get overly anxious and preseverate on everything I need to get done. This is of course not healthy. Though I don't expect to be stress-free through this process, I do think my anxiety has been affecting my day (mostly because it keeps me awake at night). I sought help via the school therapist and she referred me to a psychiatrist who recommended a medication called Citalopram. Normally, Citalopram (an SSRI) is used for treating depression and while I don't think I have depression, the same drug is useful for treating anxiety. I have basically one week to decide whether or not I want to try the med and I am really on the fence. As someone who prides herself on not taking a lot of medications, talking about this is hard. On one hand, I have been doing fine the p...

At my school, we get 4 weeks of elective time during third year. These are technically fourth year elective but they try to give you some time to figure out if you like something outside of the core clerkships. I was thinking of using 2 of my weeks to explore PM&R or Cardiology but in the end, I decided to do 2 weeks of research and 2 weeks of opthalmology. This is because I am interested in Opthalmology but not really interested in anything else so I'm going to use the research time to a) study and b) finish up some on-going research and hopefully submit an abstract to ARVO. I had a good time on opthalmology overall. I like the first week more then the second and I certainly like that there is not exam at the end but since I am studying for medicine, I didn't really slack off. Dave and I did squeeze in some fun though: a movie (mission impossible....so good), dinners with our families, massages, and I got to go on a hike and get a manicure with Felicia. Next up is 2 ...

There are moments in medicine that are truly humbling and today I had one of those moments. I was shadowing an attending in an outpatient ophthalmology clinic and one of the patients we saw was a 62-year-old woman in a wheelchair. By the time we got to her, the medical assistant had already placed her in the exam chair and her daughter was casually sitting in the wheelchair. At first, Ms. M was cheerful, stating that she is doing well but would like to see some improvement in her eyesight. I, being the naïve medical student, was hopeful…. hopeful until the doctor examined her eyes. He didn’t say anything and Ms. M filled the silence by telling us how she had a stroke a few weeks ago in California, how she lost motor capabilities in her left arm, and how it all happened during what was suppose to be a easy stent placement. A thrombotic emboli broke off and lodged in her brain and the next thing she knew, she can no longer walk, and can only barely make out outlines ...

Happy Monday!  So I am on Opthalmology rotation right now and it is Sooooo nice because there is no test at the end. This is technically part of my elective month so I am signed up for 2 weeks of opthalmology and 2 weeks of research. Last week, I was at the VA and it was great. I got to work with one of my closest friends who is currently an optho resident and I got to scrub in on some eye surgeries. This week, I am suppose to be working at another clinic but the coordinator informed me this morning that she hasn't heard back from the attending I am suppose to working with so now I am just chilling at home waiting for someone to call and tell me what to do. Though I would love to see more optho, this gives me a chance to hang out and I am super excited because I haven't had "me" time in awhile. Since I don't have an exam for opthalmology and my next rotation is just research, I am currently studying for Medicine. To be honest, Internal Medicine rotation is...

Psych Done with another rotation and though it feels good, I am bummed I didn’t do well enough on my shelf exam to honor. That thing was hard! I felt like I had really studied psych and understood the concepts. Heck, I was scoring 90s on Uworld but I didn’t prepare for the medicine questions and really random questions on the exam. At least I passed and it is one more down. Needless to say, I will not be going into psych but here are my thoughts: What I liked: - The hours. I can’t believe any medical specialty can be 9-3:30 most days. You can make $250K a year and have 60 days of vacation per year. WHAT??? - The stories: pysch patients are interesting, variable, and you never know what they are going to do or say next. I literally had a patient who was mumbled all the time and when you could catch a word, it would be an obscenity. On my last day of psych, I told her thanks for talking to me and without missing a beat, she said “you’re welcome B***H! Go to hell!” lol. - ...